RoxyThirtytwo (10:12:27 AM): DOMINIC!!
RoxyThirtytwo (10:12:31 AM): i looove you

the first thing anyone said to me today was that. waking up to that made me SO happy..  =)   thanks carly for making my day! ur the best!!

ever hear someone's alarm clock and think its a bomb? haha oh geez its so funny. some of them sound freakin real. you kno.. a monotone beep decreasing the time intervals between themselves before u just get a long solid tone. and then when there's 5 or even more going off at the same time?? haha, or better yet, in unison! so funny cuz NOBODY wakes up here.. heh, what a great place to live. well, unless that sort of thing scares u, then u'd have issues to deal with.

but i was thinking this morning before my philosphy final.. (i must be good in philosophy if i start to think before i even get to class huh?) but hey, maybe it isn't so bad here.. okay c'mon, u live in the epicenter of college students your own age. think about this: with you are 71 other college freshmen in the same freakin building, and around that building are 24 more buildings full of freshmen. thats close to 18 hundred freshmen, 18 hundred people your age. oh and did i mention the female to male ratio? its nearly 3 - 1 in our building, not bad if u ask me. granted, they're not all norcal girls which are the best looking girls ever, but hey its 3 - 1 dood. and thats just ONE of two campus villages for freshman.. dood thats almost 4 thousand freshmen.. almost as big as MHS' entire school.. okay okay so outside the dorms. so our village is pretty much smack dab in the middle of campus. walk 50 yards and i'm at my philosophy class in the giant lecture hall. hmm, so maybe class wasnt a great example. okay, so you're moments away from campus buildings atleast but then there's all the stuff too like the student center and cafes and book stores. and then there's literally thousands of people walking around all the time. and remember the ratio, 3 - 1! heh, hey it gets better when u incorporate the upper classmen girls. mainly asian too, c'mon now.. yea i kno they're still not the best girls ever but sometimes i just dont wear my glasses. LoL j/k. alrite alrite, so maybe this is all just me trying to be happier about my surroundings, but hey, maybe its not ALL bad...

in writing class today a thought occured to me.. i started to stray from what was going on in class and i started writing.. here's what it was basically

i am a dreamer. i have that mental picture of how the world should be; inherintly good and wholesome. yet if it really were this way would i have this journal? or maybe if it were this journal would just be about my happiness.. but in any case, i still like to imagine or believe that the world and/or society could be perfect. that the world can actually exist as we all once saw it as through the eyes of things like seasamie street or even Louis Armstrong, "what a wonderful world," he sings, but in reality is it? up until now, up until college this perfect or safe world really did exist, atleast to an extent. most of us were sheltered from whats really out there.. cuz schools up to and including high school made serious efforts to shield us from it using their "annoying" and "over protective" or just plain "bullshit" rules and procedures. and while during the whole school experience we all hated the extra precautions that we thought "violated our freedom of expression," it wasnt until recently when suddenly we're surrounded by smoke, weed, alcohol and excessive profanity spoken even by college lecturers, that we realize just how imperfect the world really is. it really isn't a "wonderful world".. life's a mess, it's chaos personified. so where does that leave me? where does a dreamer have a place in a world that has no place for dreams?